Coming of Age

Diverging Paths
Young men had an array of career paths to choose from. While the privileged were able to attend college, most continued the family occupation, be it farming or a trade, or joined the military. Young women had far fewer choices than their male counterparts and most chose the traditional path of wife and mother, though a select few were able to attend college or finishing school. By the mid-nineteenth century the draw of factory jobs in urban areas caused many men and women to relocate with hopes of greater fortune. Women often worked temporarily until marriage, or for the poorer women, it became a life career move.
Frustrations of Adolescence Adolescents of the nineteenth century were quite similar to teenagers of the today in their frustration with all of life around them and their increasing responsibilities. Also similar are parental attitudes toward their ambivalence.	"I hope you will give me pleasure and satisfaction in becoming a good scholar. This winter is the last experiment with you, if it fails you will trouble neither college or academy again, but must go to work on the farm. I hope after all the money and time spent upon you that you will not give your poor old father pain and mortification." (John Johnston to James Johnston, December 5, 1844)
Tentative Steps into Adulthood Debutante balls or large community parties would often be a young person’s formal introduction to the adult community. For both women and men, it signified marriage eligibility and social status. Religious ceremonies or testimonies are a powerful entrance into adulthood. In Roman Catholic, Orthodox, Lutheran, and Episcopalian ceremonies, young men or women were confirmed before the community signifying their spiritual maturity. In more evangelical Protestant traditions the Testimony, or heartfelt acceptance of Christianity, boldly shows the youth to be in control of his/her spiritual destiny apart from their parents.
"Cant you get him into some regiment in Columbus as a private I will buy him a ticket and send him … he frightens the children and abuses everything he touches …" (Julia Patterson to Jefferson Patterson, concerning Robert Patterson, March 26, 1861)
	With Care Package Despite their differences, parents still looked out for their older children and sent them letters and care packages to them while they were away from home.
	"I send you with 5 yards of summer stuff for two pair of pantaloons with as much brown muslin … You should be able to wear your outside cloths, so as not to require often washing as they are liable to fade and then they look bad … I have had the occasion to remark heretofore that you do not wear your cloths with care and economy." (John Johnston to James Johnston, March 10, 1845)